Summer has a peculiar way of reopening doors people thought they had firmly shut. Longer evenings, looser routines, crowded social calendars, and an endless parade of photos online can make an old relationship feel less like history and more like unfinished business.

A new survey from one of Social Discovery Group`s products, Dating.com suggests that plenty of singles are acting on that impulse.

According to the findings, 38% of singles have either rekindled a relationship or hooked up with an ex during the summer. At the same time, Google searches for “I’m still in love with my ex” have climbed by 362%.

In other words, knowing that you should leave an ex alone 🚫 and actually leaving them alone are two rather different propositions.

The summer months may make that gap even wider. With more free time and more opportunities to run into familiar faces, self-control can become surprisingly flimsy. An ex at a rooftop bar, a late-night message after a few drinks , or a nostalgic photograph appearing in your feed can be enough to resurrect feelings that seemed safely buried ⚰️

There is also a biological dimension to the pull. 🧠

Research into romantic attachment and the brain has found that seeing an image of a former partner can activate areas associated with reward and addiction, including the ventral tegmental area and nucleus accumbens. These regions are closely tied to dopamine 💉 and the brain’s reward circuitry. Psychology Today has noted that this activation can produce an intense urge to reconnect with the person and leave them occupying an outsized amount of your thoughts.

So, in a sense, heartbreak can resemble withdrawal. 💔 The relationship may have ended, but the brain does not necessarily receive the memo immediately. An ex is not merely someone you used to date; for a while, they can remain intertwined with the reward system your brain had grown accustomed to.

Why People Keep Going Back to Their Exes in the Summer

Omri Gillath, a professor of social psychology at the University of Kansas, offered a blunt explanation to VICE:

People may discover that solitude is less appealing than they imagined and choose “the poison they know” instead of facing the uncertainty of someone new.

Summer can amplify that temptation.

When everyone appears to be coupled up at rooftop bars, beach parties , weddings , and weekend getaways , being single can suddenly feel much more conspicuous. Starting again also requires effort. There’s the dating app , the profile, the small talk , the first date , and all the uncertainty that comes with meeting a stranger.

Going back to an ex, by comparison, is familiar territory.

Dating.com’s survey found that 39% of people download a dating app within a week of a breakup 💔, while 26% do so during the first 24 hours. That suggests the emotional landscape after a breakup is rarely straightforward. Someone can be searching for a replacement while simultaneously wondering whether the old relationship might still be salvageable.

Social media makes that emotional limbo even harder to escape. 📲
Nearly half of respondents, 49%, said they made a point of letting an ex see that they were having fun after the breakup. Another 36% admitted they posted online with the specific hope that their former partner would notice and perhaps want them back.

The classic “no contact” strategy was designed for a world where disappearing from someone’s life was actually possible. Today, the connection is much harder to sever completely. 🔗

There is always another Instagram story . A mutual friend can tag both people. A location can appear in a post. Someone can quietly check an ex’s profile or watch their latest update. 🕵️ Even without direct communication, both people can remain faintly visible to one another.

The relationship may be over, but the digital thread rarely snaps cleanly.

Perhaps the most telling figure from the Dating.com survey is this: 29% of respondents said they would take an ex back right now if that person simply asked.

No grand gesture.
No elaborate apology.
No dramatic declaration beneath a summer moon.

Just the question. ❓

Against that backdrop, a 362% rise in searches for “I’m still in love with my ex” begins to look less surprising. 📈 Sometimes, the hardest part of moving on is not forgetting the relationship. It is resisting the temptation to find out whether the door might still be open.

credits: @vice.com

And if you know someone who’d be a strong fit for Social Discovery Group, the External Referral Program is waiting for your referral!