To give you some context this F is a coworker and we became good friends which included constant contact at work and after work.

She is taken and recently I decided to lower my contact with her due to saving „friendship” as I developed feelings.

Since I went low contact with my co-worker I can tell she is bothered by this and even today she said out loud that I intentionally ignore her.

Later at work she told me to go and help someone. I replied "why don't you go and help him instead?”. She got annoyed with me refusing to do this saying I am not helping others.

I left my desk at that moment for lunch as I did not appreciate this type of manipulation, I felt she tries to use me like telling me what to do.

I kind of sensed that during my clarity moments. (I constantly think about her this is why I stopped contact week ago) and I sense that she may be using me for her pleasure and this is how I got attached towards her. She is very chatty person, attractive, she talks to many men at work.

I must have something that she likes that other men don't in the office as we "got close" together” but now I ignore her and I think she lost her "control" over me and shows her true face.

When I came back from lunch we had short conversations where I explained why I did not do as she told me. I stood my ground but I do not like to explain myself. During my explanation she said that I just did (some term from psychology) I don't remember what it is but she knows more than me about psychology and it is not first time she accuses me of being manipulative.

I think she has only negative things to say about me, she only few days ago complimented my haircut saying I look nice She called me manipulative on two occasions. This happens when I try to explain to her my reasoning for things I say or do. It bothers me because we supposed to be friends. she does not take criticism well, if I told her anything negative about her or something she did then she would go immediately defensive. At the same time she often compliments our supervisor saying how amazing he is or how she misses him when he is gone. And I never heard her say anything negative about him and I supposed to be her friend where we have „connection”.

Question: Will I achieve anything by having discussion with her about points raised? If she happened to be the manipulator or narcissist will this give her more ammunition to try and control me?

I would like to stay friends and keep the low contact. I am not trying to manipulate her I am trying to control myself by that. I don’t mean to hurt her intentionally but I know it’s a necessity for me to stay professional at work, keep her close but not too close to breach boundaries.

I understand that this is possible that she is hurt because I ignore her and we supposed to be friends. Maybe she is mad at me atm and being like that because she feels hurt as we were close and now I intentionally ignore her and she know it.

BTW one more thing she said is she booked 10 days off and I said I also booked some off and she said "I bet it is because of me, you knew you will miss me so you booked holidays as well" in jokingly manner.